Happy New Year Everyone!

I have been off life all week. By this I mean I have been off work, off blogging, etc! You get the point. I have spent the last 3 days cleaning my house in the most anal, dirt out of every crevice and corners kind of way and it actually feels pretty good. Christmas was nice. Busy, but nice. Got some nice things and spent time with the important peeps.

The Sweet One's bro got engaged last week...copy cat! Just kidding, he was kind of planning it too. What the hell is going on? I think it's in the water! It's kind of frightening. I have done absolutely NOTHING to do with wedding planning. I haven't even opened a damn bridal magazine. I didn't want to ruin my holiday vacation and without a doubt every person I meet asks the same damn questions that I have no answers to!

Random Person: When's the date?
Me: I don't know
Random Person: Where are you doing it?
Me: I don't know
RP: Who are you having in your wedding party?
Me: I don't know

You see the trend? It's kind of annoying but I guess the plans will come together soon enough. I just have to remember not to let it stress me out as you, generally, only plan one wedding your lifetime, right? Gotta keep it fun and light. If only I could find a way to eliminate all of the mothers from the planning...that would do the trick!

So the Sweet One and I are heading to the beach with some friends for New Year's Eve. Before you get jealous, realize that this beach isn't in Cabo or anything...it's in Maryland and the temperatures there will be the same as the temp's here at home...COLD! but who cares, we'll be inside drinking the whole time so it wouldn't matter if we were in the Arctic. Okay, it would because I would never be in the Arctic but you know what I'm saying!

Anyway, Before I spew more nonsense I will just say that I hope all of you have a wonderful New Years and that 2006 is a much better year for all of us! Have fun and be safe!

Okay...so I'm feeling a lot better today. I don't have everything done yet but I don't care. It'll get done. And thanks for all of your kind words and encouragement everyone!

We had a kind of impromptu engagement party last night with all of our friends. Well, most of them anyway. It was so much fun. The Sweet One's...hmmm I guess I can call him the Fiance...nah, that's gay...The Sweet One's roomies set the whole thing up. I have to admit I was pretty impressed! We went to this total dive bar that we love called the Big Hunt in Dupont Circle. They have like a million different beers on tap. We noshed on chili cheese fries and chicken fingers and drank beer and lot and lots and way too many shots! (my 5 hours of sleep is starting to catch up to me now!)

No offense to anyone but I'm not big on engagement parties as a whole. I mean, I'm all for getting pressies but there are so many damn parties and showers and expenses for guests and participants in a wedding that I feel an engagement party is just overkill. This one was done right. There was drunken debauchery, there were lots of ridiculous pictures taken on the camera (I think my boobs made an appearance!) and we even managed to get two of our friends layed!! Don't ever say we aren't good friends to have!

It was amazing to see how genuinely excited our friends were for us. It just reconfirms the fact that this is just so right...I know I'm sounding so mushy and gross but it really is people! Although now we have to live vicariously through the happy, free unmarrieds! That's alright. I never wanted to hook up with another random guy again anyway...not that I EVER did that (adjusting halo over my head)

SO...with that, I hope that everyone has a fabulous Christmas, Hannukah, Kwanza, Festivus, whatever the hell it is you celebrate. I hope that you are all surrounded by your favorite people and that above all you are happy! Merry Christmas!

Happy Fucking Half-Nekkid Thursday!

It's 1:30am and I still have a million purses to sew, gifts to wrap, things to paint, blah, blah, blah. I'm going fucking MAD. This time of year is just miserable when it comes to the gifts and other crap we stress ourselves out about. BAH HUMBUG!

I envy all of you out there sleeping right now. I'll still be awake when you get up for work bitches...merry fucking Christmas!

Tis the Season...

to get wasted with your friends on a Tuesday night...oh wait...that happens regularly so nevermind that last sentence.

Went out with some peeps last nigh. We met at the Mayflower Hotel for some drinks, mainly martini's. Who knew they had a book full of maybe 100 different martinis? It was fabulous.

There's something to be said about Christmas in the city. Now, I know this isn't Manhattan or London or whatever fancy pants city you're in, but Washington, D.C. is really quite beautiful this time of year, if not butt ass cold. The store fronts are decorated, the beautiful Christmas tree is all lit up on the Capital and White House lawns, the hotels and office buildings are all lit up and it just makes you feel good and gets you in the spirit. Or at least gets you in the mood to take in some spirits!

Anyway, I stayed at the Mayflower a lot longer and a few too many martini's then I planned. I will however recommend the Bellini-tini and the Lychee-tini if you're ever in the hood...We then somehow ventured over to the Wonderland Ballroom to meet some other friends. And, because the only thing I had for dinner was the 4 olives in my martini and a lychee fruit I ended up ordering one of their famous chili cheese footlong hot dogs! That's right...and it was fucking phenomenal (I'll be in the gym this evening, after I shake the delayed hangover I know I'll get around 10am)! I did share it. There's kind of something erotic about shoving a footlong in other people's mouths. I guess I couldn't have looked to saintly myself but whatever. I think it was the greatest tasting thing I've ever had, OR I was wasted and starving...

Anyway, only three more work days and I'm hoping they fly by. I have so much damn work to do before this week is out and that is the last thing I feel like doing. It's the week before Christmas. Time to eat, drink, play, not do any work!!! I hope everyone is doing well, doing no work and has all of their silly shopping done! Merry Whatever you celebrate...

Yes...I AM gloating!

Well, it was a fun weekend. Lots of holiday parties and celebrating the engagement...and OF COURSE the game last night. It felt so good to sweep the Dallas Cowgirls in our house! They just couldn't do anything right and it was nice to have the shoe on the other foot for once. It seemed the Skins couldn't do anything wrong! I can't believe I have a voice today. The stadium was the loudest I've ever heard it and it was the best way to start off the holidays!

Anyway, enough about that...this week is full of more drinking, eating and being merry! I plan to get to the gym every day this week so that I can eat whatever I want and not worry about it. Which reminds me...this morning at the gym a woman in the locker room had the hairyest under arms! It was so hideous! I wanted to gag. WHY people? WHY? I don't get that...And I'm not exaggerating but it was worse than The Sweet One's underarms and he's allowed! I also saw another woman (who was quite young, maybe in her late 20's early 30's) with the biggest 70's bush I've ever seen. I mean, whatever, you can do what you want but SERIOUSLY...is that even comfortable? I mean...I would rather cut my goods off than have them all hairified.

Now...I must get to my x-mas gifts. I bought pretty much everything today (I even took a half day off work to try and get my shopping done)! I'm such a slacker and the things that I'm making for people I haven't even started on! I know I'm going to be up until 3am every night working like a little sewing elf! UUGGH! Well, I hope everyone else is getting all of their shopping done. Ahhh...the true meaning of Christmas...

Pigs in Space! (remember that? Please tell me someone does...)

Yeah, yeah, everyone has their issues with feet. Either you hate them or you love em.

Here are my pigs sunning themselves in Phoenix. Happy HNT Everyone!

Phoenix...the land of strip malls...

So, we got to go to Phoenix. Our original flight out was cancelled and changed and I was SO excited to be traveling through Chicago since that's safe and all with airplanes skidding off run ways and because it makes a lot of sense to go to Chicago on your way to Phoenix...but I digress. Here is what we left at 5am on Friday morning:

and here is was we arrived to find:



Sunshine and 75 degrees. What a relief!


So...now the groovy news and the reason that the Sweet One is so dreamy...He arranged the best spa day at the Camelback Inn on Saturday. We layed by the pool all day. Sunned our cheeks, both sets, drank lots and lots of yummy adult bevvy's, got massages - the BEST massage I have ever had in my life by the way. I think I was coming in and out of consciousness it was so damn good! He rented us a beautiful suite. Look at this view out of our back patio:

we had cheese and fruit and wine waiting for us after all of our activities, then dinner with our friends that live in Phoenix. We had plans to meet my mom and step dad after dinner for some drinks (they were also in town for the Redskins game and to hang with some of their friends). After dinner our friends lamed out on us and decided to go home. I was kind of bummed but whatever. They dropped us off at our room so that we could drop off our things and then head out to meet my parents. We got inside and...I'll let the pictures tell the rest of the story....

I said yes!

Half-Nekkid Ouchie

This is where I got the damn flu shot. Now my arm is sore as hell.

And yes, I am a big freakin baby...

I'm wearing my 'hot tub' bikini top in this pic, especially for Os, just in case we don't get any bikini shots in Phoenix...I only wear this suit in the hot tub and it smells so badly of chlorine. I wash it after every soak with the yummiest smelling detergents but for some reason the odor never goes away. Maybe I over chlorine, who knows. So, I'll continue to ruin this suit all for the sake of hot tubbing and save all the others for the beach. Is it almost summer again yet?

Happy HNT everyone. If you don't get it I'm not talking to you anymore but you can click on the purdy blue button on the right and I might reconsider...

Flu shots are for sissies!

Okay...so I'm a sissy. Generally I don't get flu shots. Yeah, that's right...I live on the edge. The Flu you say? Bring it on bitches! Not to mention, my muscular arms would break that baby needle in two.

Well, my office was giving the flu shot out today for 10 bucks a pop. Usually I pay a lot more for a needle in my arm so I was thinking this was a bargain. Okay, I'm lying again. Don't worry, I don't do heroin. My drugs of choice won't kill me, at least not for a number of years anyway...

So, I am also a huge wuss when it comes to needles. And to be quite honest I don't want to be sick in Phoenix this weekend, which by the way, it's supposed to snow here Thursday into Friday. I am praying that we will be able to leave this miserable cold weather to head to a little warmth!! and a SPA! Might not happen...Yikes! Pray that I get to Phoenix people, pray for me.

Okay, so I got a flu shot. It didn't hurt. I'm a big baby, and apparently, did you know that they don't make you sick anymore like they used to? So bring on the bird flu! I'll fight it and I'll win, again! That's right...I've had a flu shot bitches!

Snow Blower...

don't ask...I think I just wanted to say 'blower'.

When I got out of work last night I went to the fabric store. I know...ooohh! Scandalous!! Yeah, bite me. I went to get fabric for new purses that I'm making and they are too freakin cute. It was great because, as predicted, it was pretty empty and I got everything done and lots of attention from the employees since no one else was really dumb enough to be out shopping. Although, I do think I am really the smart one because I stayed far, far away from the grocery store and all of the french toast addicts out there!

When I left the store my car was covered and the parking lot was pretty empty and covered with snow...hmmm, I didn't expect that. It was a slower than planned ride home but it was all good. It snowed all through the night and now the sun is out so I am expecting the sun will melt all the goodness away. This kind of snow does nothing for me. Unless I can tell my boss that I won't be in it's just an added headache to the commute. I pretty much refuse to drive in the snow/ice anymore (the heavy stuff) - not because I can't drive because, I'm pretty sure we covered the fact that I am a great driver, but because most other people can't drive and I was once in an accident in the snow b/c some jackass guy was going too fast and we both uncontrollably slid into one another. It's just not worth it for me. This little bit of snow isn't even worth my time, but I must admit it's very pretty outside.

My yard/car this morning

my hot tub just begging for someone to get in!

A Cardinal outside my window this morn, it's like a blurry, drunk post card

The little brats next door playing in the snow

In better, warmer news...the Sweet One and I are going to Phoenix this weekend. Where the sun will be shining and unlike summer there where it's about a billion degrees out, it will be just perfect. In the 70's if weather.com is right. We leave on Friday morning and it can't come soon enough. Hope everyone's having a wonderful Tuesday!

The Good, The Bad and The Craft Show...

Well, the craft show was a bust once again. I sold one mirror totaling a whopping $15. I paid $25 to be in the show! AND I bought something from another vendor so currently I am in the hole $35 HA HA! Good times!

I came the closest I ever will to wanting to punch a kid. Here's the exchange:

Dad - oh look at these great mirrors sweetie
Girl (who looked about 11 or 12 yrs old) - eeeeeeeeeehhhhhhh waaaaaaa wioagiejgijsigwoieghhknkfn
Dad - You could hang it in your room and brush your hair in it (note - it didn't appear this girl owned a brush let alone fixed her hair with anything but a twig from the yard)
Girl - more whining and ugly noises
Dad - it already has your name on it, he then asks me if the mirrors with names were designated for someone else or if they could buy it
Me - nope! They're all for sale, you can take it home right now (in my most chipper I hate you but you're about to buy something from me voice)
Dad - Alex, come here, do you not like the mirror or what? What's your problem?
Me - wow, that's the first time I've ever seen a kid NOT want something...
Dad - ALEX! Why are you acting like this, it's ugly and you look like a spoiled brat
Girl (obviously named Alex) - wwwwahhhagekhaigh gaighaghiagi

They walk away....I want to punch the stupid kid in the gut. WTF? What kid needs to be coaxed into a mirror? Let alone a mirror that is personalized? I mean, her dad was about to buy her something on the spot. He didn't even ask me how much it cost? He was willing to buy it no matter what . UUGGGHH! That was so frustrating. Usually it's the parents I have to work on, not the kids!

Anyway, I also got the standard craft show responses that blow my mind every time:
Oh, I didn't bring that much money to spend
Oh, I didn't bring my wallet
I'm just looking around
Do you have such and such? Oh you do? Oh okay, maybe I'll come back (never see them again)
Can you hold this aside for me? (never see them again)
My dog ate my checkbook...okay, I made that one up but it wouldn't shock me if someone used that one.

The good thing about the whole experience is that I met some great people, did some networking, got some great ideas and was invited to some outdoor markets where you ALWAYS make money. The problem with this show, and don't get me wrong, no one did well, it wasn't just that my stuff sucks and no one buys it, it was a small show, there wasn't a lot of traffic and I don't think it was advertised properly. But, whatever. You live and you learn and I am now going to be a craft show snob. Unless it's a big ass show where I am guaranteed to do some bidness I aint going!

The rest of the weekend was pretty fun. I went to a great holiday party on Saturday night and got pretty loaded. I made myself, with all my might, go home at about 1:30am when everyone else was going out to the bars. It was so sad BUT when I got up at 8am for this shitty craft show I was thanking god that I didn't continue on for another 3 hours of sloppy drunkenness. And then I was cursing god when I felt like ass and was hung over in a synagogue multipurpose room selling nothing for 4 hours!

Anyway, they're calling for snow this afternoon in D.C. I am so completely embarrassed to say this but schools in the area are already dismissing students early due to the impending inclement weather. Is that not the most moronic thing you've ever heard? It's so, so pathetic. I can't imagine what the grocery stores look like right now! This is my favorite time to get regular shopping done, like at the mall, because this is when it's like a ghost town. I get my shit done, I shop, I don't have to deal with crowds and then it never snows. It's brilliant. I am secretly hoping it does snow though so the Sweet One and I can hunker down in front of the fire and get the Christmas tree that he cut down up and decorated...how domestic huh?

Okay, babbling completed. Must work. Later gators!

It's Friday YAYY!

So, we've been having a foosball tournament all day in my office. It started at 10am and the final championship game is at 5pm as we combine it with a group happy hour. It could get ugly!

This place used to be a great place to work. Then we hit a little slump and now...well, we're back! I work in Marketing for my company so the whole marketing group is participating in the shenanigans for today. It's a large company so it's a very big group. I mean, we went all out. There are trophies and prizes for the winners. Even the champions of the whole event get a cash prize on top of their sweet trophy! There are even trophies for best costumes, best trash talkers and best losers...(I'll post some of the lame pictures later...he he)

So, me and a friend of mine were a team. Our name was E.T. Foos Home. We lost in the first round to a team called The Ball Busters, appropriately enough...It's okay because we look cute as hell! We have on our E.T. tee's and I made us an iron on for the back with E.T. playing foos ball! We both also wore ribbons in our hair, which is in pig tails (just like Drew Barrymore in E.T.) and sneakers. We look about 12 but hey, it works.

Right now the Foos Fighters (that was gonna be my team name but my partner nixed it...oh well) and Foos Your Daddy are in the lead but there are a lot of teams coming up to try and steal their top spots. Man...it's really nice not doing any work on a Friday! I'll pay for this on Monday...yuck!

Anyway, this weekend is busy as usual. I have a super fun holiday party to go to at my friend Kari's place in the Dupont urea (yeah I meant to spell it like that...it's called ebonics people...that's how we do it in D.C.). I am sure I will feel wonderful on Sunday when I try my hand once again at the craft show circuit. This time I'll be at a synagogue. I guess selling things at craft shows means that you'll be bored to tears and have to deal with one religious group or another while you're doing it. I just hope I sell some shit this time. If not then I'm done. I'm just gonna start whoring myself out for my web site. Maybe that'll work. Okay, let's face it, I'm not working too hard on getting myself out there. It's okay though. I'm busy. I have a ton of orders to fill and I don't feel any deep compulsion to make myself crazy this holiday season. Wish me luck everyone. Hope you all have a great weekend. I plan to!!

Happy HNT

not much to say...me for HNT. In the car on the way back from the beach. I was half nekkid from the neck down. No, really, I was. Have a good one y'all...