The Funky Bee

My own personal blah, blah, blah...

Monday, April 30, 2007

I just finished reading a book called Queen of the Oddballs by Hillary Carlip and it was so great. I loved it. When I read the reviews on Amazon.com people either hated this book or loved it so I figured I would have to decide for myself and I'm so glad I did. If anyone is looking for a quick, summer/beach, no brainer read I recommend this one!

So this weekend we had a baby shower for one of my best friends who is having TWINS!A girl and a boy. Yikes...I made (well, painted) her a table and chairs for the babes. Here are some shots that I took of it:


























I hope to make some more tables and different designs soon to get up on my web site to sell.

This weekend was pretty low key. The weather is finally getting consistently warm here and I am loving it. Hope everyone else had a fabulous weekend!

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Well after 3 awesome weeks of LOST we get a real lame-o episode last night...Oh well. They can't all be Emmy worthy I presume.

Other than that, I really have to apologize because I am at a total loss. I have absolutely NOTHING to say, and that seems odd, even to me. Every time I get ready to write something it ends up being so boring and lame that I erase it. Maybe that's what happened to the LOST writers last night. Anyway, I'm going to catch up on all of you since I have nothing to contribute. Hopefully I'll do something exciting tonight/this weekend and have something to spew about.

Adios amigos!

UPDATE:

Never, EVER complain that you're boring, have nothing to talk about, nothing has happened...whatever. I totally jinxed myself.

I just came back inside from an hour + of trying to get my fucking dog from my neighbors yard! I am bleeding, I am dirty, it decided to POUR while I was out there, the dog is muddy and wet, I WAS in a white sweatshirt but I don't know that it will ever be white again. I almost started crying at one point I was so frustrated.

So, back story...the other night my dog found a spot in the gate between our house and our weird neighbors house where she could shimmy under to the other side. Thankfully this happened when my husband was taking her out and the neighbor was in her yard so she opened the gate for him to come get her.

Well today I decide to go into work a little late. I'm home, I'm doing some work on the computer and hey, the poor dog needs to go out, I'll take her real quick. The little shit goes straight for the spot. I yell for her. She taunts me. I pull out a treat. She runs in circles in the neighbors yard. I walk away. She comes towards the fence. WHAT THE FUCK AM I GONNA DO?

I go check the neighbors gate and it's bolted shut and too tall to jump. I go to the other side and the fence is about 7 feet tall with no handle so that's out. I go to the door and no one comes. I knock, I knock, I knock...nothing but yippy dog barks from inside.

I go inside and get the step stool and place it on the other side of the fence for the dog to step up and I'll grab her and pull her over. Yeah...right! I put the step stool on the outside of the fence and place my recycling bin on the inside of the fence. I try to climb over but it's still too high so I can't reach the bin meaning if I get over I will never be able to get back.

I go get the leash and somehow get it on the dog through one of the gate posts. At this point my arms and hands are scraped and bruised. Then I hear thunder. I swear it was like a bad joke. Then it starts pouring and my dog is running back and forth in the dirt. FUCK!

I go back into my yard and try to coax her back to the spot where she climbed through. She comes for a treat and I grab her collar. She's pissed. I'm shaking I'm so mad. I grab a hold of the leash and thread it through the fence until I get in the right spot. More scrapes and bruises. I pull the fence up so she sees she can come back through. I start pulling her leash. Finally she's close enough that I can grab her legs. She starts flailing wildly and trying to bite me. I wanted to KILL HER. I was really on the verge of tears at this point. So I've got the fence in one hand trying to pull it up. I have the leash in the other hand, the dog is pulling so hard I think my fingers are gonna get snipped off. Finally she pulls really hard and the fence slips through my fingers...slice. There's blood all over. NOW I AM READY TO FUCKING KILL! I'm laying in dirt and ivy and whatever excrement that my dog leaves in that particular spot. My husband is on his way home to help me. I am done. She can fucking rot over there for all I care. I tie her leash to an azalea bush and I get up and walk away. Before I could get to the back door that little bitch comes right under the fence on her own.

She is currently in her crate where she will stay until I calm down and feel like letting her out. Now I have to go take a shower because I look and smell like a wet dog!

Monday, April 23, 2007


This weekend was beautiful FINALLY! I think the winter is finally over here. On Saturday Nola had a play date with my friend's two boxers and although she's a lot younger than them she really held her own. It was fun watching them interact.

I found out that one of my friends "found" this blog the other day. I don't really care but it is a little weird...I mean, when it's out in the public I guess the only thing it can be is found...Oh well.

Has everyone been watching LOST? It has been SO good. I hate Julia that little cunt! I can't wait to see how this whole plot unfolds. For those of you that watch, do you think that Jack is a total douche or is he playing her right back? I can't wait to find out.

So last week when we were in Florida we watched The Sopranos and Entourage with my aunt and uncle. They were both really good episodes so we decided that when we got home we'd get HBO again. We haven't had it in a long time b/c it's just wasted money at this point and we basically gave up on The Sopranos because it sucks and they take really long hiatuses. Since it's the last few ep's we reconsidered. Anyway, we go through the process, we get HBO all set up and we hunker down to watch a night of programming last night. The only word that comes to mind is BBBOOOOORRRIING! Wow! What a complete and utter disappointment. The Sopranos is still as dumb as I remember it. It sucked. And, I happen to like Entourage but the hubby thought it sucked last night too. So, if you're considering getting HBO or getting back into these lame shows, don't. Go enjoy the nice weather instead.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Seaside




Well, this is where we were for the last 5 days and yes, it was beautiful. The weather for the most part was excellent, the water was crystal blue, the sand was soft and white and above all it was WARM and SUNNY! It was great.

Yesterday had to be the longest travel day on earth. We started our travels at 11am from Seaside and didn't get home until about 12am today. Landing in DC could be compared to being on a roller coaster. I thought I was going to hurl a couple of times! I just prayed that we wouldn't end up in the Potomac River, or worse, the Anacostia!! I have also never spent such a long time in an airport in my life. I was ready to pitch a tent in Atlanta and we were tempted to take the offer from the airline for a place to stay, a meal voucher and two free tickets just to get out of the damn airport but we just wanted to get home to our dog and our bed. I'll spare you all of the other travel details but I am really tired today.


I thought long and hard how to describe Seaside. I'll start by telling you that The Truman Show was filmed here, I've never seen the movie but it's so appropriate. At first I wanted to say that it reminded me of a Stepford type of place. Very WHITE, very rich, almost robotic. Then on the third day or so it came to me...it's where the "Others" live on LOST. It's kind of culty. At one point I was afraid I was getting too much sun on the beach because perhaps I would be too dark for this town and possibly thrown out. I kid, but being from the DC area and traveling to a town so obviously lacking in diversity was kind of depressing.

The wedding was of course beautiful. The bride is in the fashion industry in Manhattan and let me tell you, it showed, oh, that and the fact that her parents are stinkin rich. It was straight out of a magazine. This is just a mere glimpse into the event.






We had all expense events planned from the minute we arrived on Wednesday until Sunday morning. It was truly a whirlwind long weekend. Of course our house was the party house. Everyone somehow ended up at our casa late night every evening. We drank a lot, ate well and didn't get a lot of sleep - although I am ready to tackle having a dog again - we missed our pup so much! It would be an understatement to say that we are exhausted and will have to use this week to recover.






I hope everyone had a great weekend. I can't wait to catch up on all of you.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

We're leaving tomorrow morning for Seaside, Florida. Right now, since I haven't been there before I can only classify this potentially beautiful vacation spot as the hardest damn place to get to. We live in the Washington, D.C. area. By all means a flight to Florida should last no longer than 2 and a half hours TOPS. Oh no, not to Seaside, Florida. First of all there is no such thing as a "direct flight" there which pisses me right off. I'll gladly pay extra to fly anywhere direct. Second, there is no really close airport to fly into. We are flying into Pensacola, a short two hour drive away on a good day. Third we have to fly through Atlanta. If you've ever been to the Atlanta airport you'll know that it can also be classified as hell on earth, along with Miami airport but that's another story...And lastly, I am going to miss the hell out of our puppy!

Now I'll stop complaining because in about 28 hours I'll be in sunny, warm Seaside, Florida! The hubby is in one of his best bud's wedding and we're really looking forward to it. We made our plans before we had the pup so we made it an extended long weekend. Now that we have the pup we're kind of sad that we have to leave her for so long. On the other hand I can not wait to sleep and have relations with my husband because in between the 600 obligations we have from Wednesday to Monday that is what I plan to do. Since getting this dog I haven't slept past 7:30am and finding time alone with my man has not been easy. I swear children might be easier...

So, in the event of no internet access or sheer busy-ness I wish you all a wonderful week/weekend. Oh, and I've had about 4 pieces of bacon already today...HA. I love pigs. They're delicious.

Monday, April 09, 2007

separated at birth

Call me crazy but are these bitches not twins? Janice might be a little cuter than Fuggie but good ole Ferg is trying hard. If her next band is called Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem I'm calling the fed's!

P.S. I think I've eaten about 7 pieces of bacon today. I have problems...

Thursday, April 05, 2007

So I went to dinner last night with 4 of my greatest friends from high school. I see two of them here and there and we try and get together every now and then but the other two, who were my best friends ever, my partners in crime, my butt buddies, were also there and it was so much fun.

We laughed for probably 3 hours straight. I'm surprised we got any food down at all since I felt like most of mine was going to come out of my nose the entire time. There's something about getting together with your old gang that just takes you back. Immediately your "adult" status just goes right out the window and it's completely justified to talk about people like you're a bratty 15 year old again. I mean, making fun of people, talking about what a bitch blah blah's mom was, the teacher that was asked to leave for possibly having relations with a former student, who had sex with who, who wanted to have sex with who, who got hot, who is gross now, who is unfortunately still stuck in high school mode, and of course how much cooler and better we are than everyone else...good times, good times...

One of the saddest things that came out of the evening was the news that one of my old boyfriends died a few months ago from a drug overdose. He was younger than me so he was probably about 28 when he died. Apparently not married and had no kids but damn it's pretty fucked up. We were young but he was one of my dearest boyfriends and although I broke up with him - I mean, that's what you do when you're young - I always respected him and still liked him a lot. We went to two different private high school's. Some days I would get a ride to his house after school and then his dad would take me to his wrestling meets. It was a fun, innocent time in my life. Well, as innocent as high school can be anyway. At the time we dated his family was going through rough times. His parents were divorcing and his siblings were kind of spread out throughout the family. The two youngest with the mom, the oldest with their dad and him with his grandparents. They went through a weird, tough upbringing but I always thought, or maybe hoped, that he would be the one to make something good of his life. It's just so horrible to know that he had to succumb to such a horrible death due to addiction...I guess more disappointing is knowing he just didn't know the value of his life.

Oh well, no more sad. It's the circle of life I presume. I am grateful for my life, my wonderful husband, my healthy, happy family and for bacon...life goes on! Hope everyone is having a great day...

Monday, April 02, 2007

Well, we had a semi chill weekend although for some reason I am still totally exhausted.

Friday night The Sweet One and I had a low key dinner at a local Malaysian restaurant. It was so delicious. We came home and chilled with our pup.

On Saturday morning I got up before the sun and took the pooch to class. We did GREAT! She's still a little timid with people she doesn't know and we had to be excluded from the "pass the pup" exercise as to not freak Nola out, but other than that she was a star. Everybody loves her because she's just so cute. We were even the class example for one of our newly learned homework assignments. Nola also did not mess at all in the facility. One little-miss-know-it-all pet owner's pup peed probably a total of 6 times in the ring and another pooch peed and pooped right in the middle of the floor. I know it's natural and they're just puppies but it felt good to know that my baby wasn't one of the "bad one's" he he he...I know it must have been embarrassing for the mom's who had to clean it up.

Saturday evening we had some friends over to watch the BORING final four games. We cooked out and even broke out our fire pit since it was a little cool at night. It was a lot of fun. One of our friends is the designated margarita maker and he lived up to his title...We went through a gallon of Tequila...enough said!

Sunday we had brunch with my family because my bro was in town from Minneapolis. It was YUMMY! then I had to get my sorry ass to church for Palm Sunday. Hubby ran the dog around for a very short time and he tuckered her little butt right out. She was out for the count for pretty much the rest of the evening. It's nice to know she is easily tired. It makes for an easy puppy to handle.

Anyway, that's about it. It's beautiful here today. In the 80's and my lucky husband has some pretty good friends that just randomly call to tell him he has a ticket to the National's season opener this afternoon waiting for him at will-call. And an even nicer work environment that let's him just take the rest of the afternoon to enjoy warm weather, ice cold brew's, good friends and a day at the ball park. I'm so glad someone's enjoying this perfect weather! Hope you all are too.