my smiley baby

my smiley baby

It is taking every ounce of courage for me to write this, which is killing me because this makes it more real...

Wednesday will go down in history as the worst day of the hubby and my lives. I can not bear to rehash all of the details but I will tell you that there was an accident. Our Nola was rushed to the animal hospital where she passed away a short time later.

Hubby and I are beside ourselves with grief. We are beyond devastated. Our hearts are truly broken and we're not quite sure how we're going to get through this one. We are so lucky to have each other to lean on and I have to say, we are blessed to have some very supportive family and friends.

my little cat fish dog

We know it's hard for people to understand the magnitude of this unless they have pets. There is a bond that occurs that, unless you've experienced it, means nothing to you. She was our baby. She was part of our family and life will never be the same without her. She brought so much joy and happy memories to our lives.

Being in our house is like torture. Everything we do, see, smell, hear reminds us of her. We keep waiting for her precious little face to come poking around the corner or her little nails to come clattering down the hall on the hardwood floors. We keep waiting for her to come jump up on the bed at night to snuggle. Uugghh, this is so hard.

We want to stop crying. We want to stop hurting. We keep thinking it's going to get easier but it just seems to get harder and to hurt more.

worn out

I'm currently battling with myself as to whether or not we should get a new dog right away or even at all. I don't know if I can ever get a new dog. will I always compare her to my Nola? I mean, I know that a new dog will never be her and will have it's own personality and quirks, etc. Can I live in this quiet house again without a new baby? How will I stay in this house alone when my hubby has to work late at night? She was my companion, she was my protector. I always felt at ease when she and I were home alone.

The hubby and I are going on a much needed vacation next week. We've actually decided to start it a little early under the circumstances and we're leaving this evening. It couldn't have come at a better time. We're hoping to use this time to be together, collect ourselves and hopefully come back a little less broken.

Say prayers for us that our hearts will mend. Go hug your pets, your kids, your family and your friends.