Crazy Pregnancy Dreams

So, for the last two nights in a row I've had dreams that I've had the baby.

The first night I didn't remember giving birth but we arrived at a restaurant that looked oddly like our local crab house, where my family and our baby were waiting. He was awfully big, definitely not an infant of a few hours or even a few days old. He looked probably 8 or 9 months old and had big blue eyes and blond hair. I just remember continually telling everyone that I didn't remember the birth at all and that I just wasn't ready yet. The room isn't ready, the house isn't ready and we hadn't even put the stroller together for god's sake. I had to run home to go get the car seat to take the baby home from the restaurant - no hospitals in sight...hmmm.

Last night I remember that labor was really hard...?? Then, next thing you know I have another rather large "baby". This one resembled maybe a 2 or 3 year old with really long legs. He had dark brown hair, eyes and olive skin. I kept saying, "See, this is why he kept kicking me, his legs are so long, and that must be why he came so early, he was getting too big"...?

Weird, weird and weird!

The baby is kicking/moving like crazy but he's like the singing frog. Whenever I tell the hubby to come feel my belly he stops. It happens EVERY time. I am not kidding. The hubby has yet to feel the little monster move.

I am assuming by my recent dreams that I am getting nervous about getting things done and preparing for the baby because the room is not finished or even close to it, the stroller is not put together, blah blah blah. And, I think it's dawning on me that we're about to HAVE A BABY! I know there's time but I am a big planner and need everything in order to relax and at this point nothing is in order. I've been told that once I have my shower I'll feel better. I think I just need to relax!

I am also suffering from the dreadful pains of HEARTBURN! And when I say heartburn, I mean the worst, most painful thing you've ever dreamt of. I've never experienced heartburn this bad in my life. It feels almost like I've swallowed a gallon of acid and it is on the verge of coming back up at any moment. It lingers from my chest to the back of my throat at all times and I want to die. AND, the sad part is, it's not triggered by anything in particular. It just happens no matter what I eat or drink or when I consume it. Some dumb whore gave me a Zantac on Monday to combat it. Let me tell you something...that shit does NOT WORK! Tums E-X on the other hand have become my new best friend. I am going to the store at lunch time to buy a case of it.

Wow, who knew all that goes into cooking a baby person in your belly? And that's not even the half of it. Be glad I'm sparing you some of the real gnarly shite! At least, from what I've heard, it's all worth it in the end...until they become teenagers that is. Yikes!